When you finally decide, I promise to be gone. Far enough gone not to matter. Everyday i feel like I have to fight the urge to just forget this all. When I finally stop being a fucking ego boast to you.
You know I think? I think all this self-appreciation is a mask to how you really feel about yourself, like a way to force yourself to believe you don’t have flaws. I think you use it to protect yourself from the world, because your to afraid to be hurt to gamble any of your feelings. You measure out standards unreachable so that you dont have to worry about attaining anything else.
Why keep me around in this false sense of security. I want so badly to be able to lose faith in you, but i reach from something so much stronger. I never fear being hurt, i give my life everything i can. I throw my self at oppurtunities. What if i was like you, like everyone else and held it all back? I gamble with the hopes it will someday pay off. I dont think its worth it anymore. I dont think you are.
If only i really believed that..
the problem with the truth?
its real.
and you sir are scared of such truth.
